HEART BROKEN

Life is pretty much mess right now heh. That 'stupid' thingy getting more harder and keep haunting me. Theres always an evil mood inside my body. Is it wrong for me being mad (?) It just, i am really suprised with what happened right know. I hate you i hate you i hate you, shit i really hate this feeling. I want us to be a good friend, but i cant :( How could you do this to me (?) You never write your status like 'that' when you with me. Now im asking, DO YOU EVER LOVE ME BEFORE (?) It is really hard watching both of you in love and happy. Really really hard. Put your shoes in my situation, and you will feel how hard it is. Thats the reason why i delete both of you from my fb friend list. I cant be your friend, but i think i can be your good enemy. Well A, you can say whatever you want. But i just want you to know that i do love you. I miss the L words. I really hope that you will appreciate me, the old memories and the L words. Bcs the L words is the precious word ever. There's a lot of your stuff here. Tshirts, the angpow, rings, pictures of us blablabla. Should i burn it (?) Should i throw it (?) No, i will keep it as my good memory with you. Thankyou so much for all the things, i really really appreciate it. Now i know that you really hate me, really mad at me. Same goes with me too. You know what (?) I miss you more than i love you but i think i hate you the most. It takes time for me to be okay, to heal the heart broken. Please, im begging to both of you, stay away from my life :'(

Dear A,
HAPPY BECOMING BIRTHDAY (!) Im sorry, i cant wish you on your birthday. Im sorry, i cant buy you a birthday present. Im sorry, i cant make a surprise party for you. I remember, when the good old times, your birthday is the part where i really hope i can plan something big for you. I always dream to make best-birthday-ever for you. But now i realized that it is only a dream not reality :(

And for you girl, i hate you. I'll remember that you used to be my great close friend, but now (?) Lets pretend that we never know each other. Treat him okay. Do take care of him and please dont hurt his feelings. Bcs he used to be nice to me and he's one of the best i ever had.

Farewell :'(